A Safe Harbour
Posted on Thu Jan 31st, 2019 @ 6:11pm by Senior Captain Connor McKinney M.D. PhD & Captain Madeline Sanchez
Edited on on Thu Jan 31st, 2019 @ 7:02pm
Mission:
The First Step...
Location: Maddie's Apartment
Timeline: 2388/08/27 0200 (August 27 2388 2:00am)
It was late when Connor beamed within Magellan Campus' Transportation Center. Struggling to hold it together, he only slightly acknowledged the transporter operator there as he quickly walked out of the room.
He entered one of the transit tubes, and got off just short of the normal stop for his apartment building, having decided he needed to walk the rest of the way.
Maddie opened her eyes and stared at the chronometer. 2AM. Sighing she sat up. She hadn't slept a wink since she had got home even though she had forced herself to stay in bed. Her thoughts had been focused on Connor. Wondering how he was. Whether there had been any news.
Swinging her legs off the bed, the sexy Puerto Rican reached for the Risian silk robe at the end of the bed and put it on, tying it around her naked body as she headed for the balcony. It had fast become her thinking place and after stepping out through the french doors, she rested her arms on the railing and looked out over the beach and the ocean, the sound of the waves beating against the shore soothing her soul.
Her door chime rang. It was Connor on the other side of it. His eyes were glassy and his face looked drawn. It had been a horrible night and it didn't feel like it was going to get any better. He felt he needed her, yet also feeling lost and hopeless, when she didn't immediately come to the door, he pounded on it once with the side of his fist, and then started walking towards his.
Maddie had only just heard the doorchime above the sound of the ocean and in the few brief seconds it took her to get to the door, she opened it only to find the doorway empty. Turning her head to the side she saw him, her breath catching in her throat as she whispered "Connor?"
Connor heard her and stopped walking. He kept his back to her but she could tell by the way his shoulders slouched and gently shook that he was extremely upset. Not wanting her to see him cry, unsure why, he covered his eyes with one hand. Although she had seen him lose it only hours earlier when he had gotten the news, he didn't want her to see him fall apart.
"Come here." she said quietly, her heart squeezing in pain as she saw the defeated slouch of his shoulders before she added "Please?"
After wiping over his face with one of his hands, he took in a couple of deep breaths before turning around halfway to look at her. "Maddie..." he started, and then went to her quickly, pulling her into his arms.
"I was only in the way." he said a moment later, his head bent and resting against hers as they hugged.
Maddie hugged him tightly and rested her head against him. "In the way of the investigation?" she asked softly as she closed her eyes and inhaled the familiar scent of him.
Connor pulled out of the hug, and then he nodded. "The Admiral ordered me to leave." He ran a hand down over his mouth out of stress, "I didn't exactly give him a choice..." and he sounded tired. He felt exhausted.
Taking his hand, Maddie led him back into her apartment and asked "What do you mean? You didn't give him a choice?"
"I was demanding. I lost my temper...more than once. I needed..." he swallowed down the dryness in his throat before he could finish, "the answers right then 'n' there. I'm going in reverse, Maddie..." the sorrow at what was happening was all over his face. He shook his head, "I can't let that happen. I can't..." and he broke down, reaching out for her again and feeling weak as the day came crashing down on him.
"And we won't let it." Maddie went into his arms, holding him tightly as she gently stroked his hair and let him cry. If she could provide him with comfort then she was more than happy to oblige. She didn't want him to feel alone in all this. As far as she was concerned, they were in this together and right now she had to be his rock.
He closed his eyes, "I feel like the best part of who I am, the best part of me is missing..."
"You're brother's missing Connor." Maddie said softly, "You're supposed to feel lost and confused and it's supposed to hurt like hell." she added kissing his cheek and nuzzling against him.
His hand held onto the side of her head, and he touched his forehead to hers. "I need you." he said, every ounce of energy draining from him. "Can I stay here tonight?"
"Of course you can." Maddie said softly, "We're a team now." she added wanting him to know that he could lean on her if he needed to.
He gently fisted her hair, pulling away enough to look into her eyes. "Right now I need to lie down."
"Then let's go to bed." Maddie met his gaze before extracting herself from his grasp. Holding out a hand to him she said "Come on."
Accepting her hand, Connor went with her, allowing her to lead him into her bedroom where he sat heavily down on her bed. Not saying anything, he started removing his uniform jacket, and stopped. He cupped the back of his neck with both hands, struggling to come to full terms with all that he had said and did over at the station. It reran through his mind like a recording. "I don't think I'm going to be able to sleep." he said quietly.
"Then don't sleep." Maddie replied as she sat down beside him, "Just lay down, hold me and if you want to talk."
He nodded at her offer. "A year ago I would have handled this with a bottle of scotch..." He said, and then felt surprised he had admitted it. It was amazing he hadn't become an alcoholic, that it hadn't gone that far. OCD sufferers were often time candidates for it. He even knew this at the time and it hadn't stopped him. He destroyed a relationship with help from it. So not saying another word, he resumed taking off his jacket, and was thankful when she started helping him. He removed his shirt, and still wearing a tank top, laid back on the bed, kicking his shoes off at the end of it. Closing his eyes, he felt her lay next to him.
Having been wearing nothing in bed before she had got up, Maddie opted to leave her robe on, unsure how he'd feel about her removing it. Their relationship was after all new and despite the fact that they knew each other intimately, somehow flaunting herself in his face right now didn't seem right. Snuggling up to him she said "Well now you don't have to handle anything like this on your own with a bottle. You have me." she lifted her head slightly so that she could look at him in the moonlight streaming through her open windows.
He opened his eyes at her words and stared back at her. She was so beautiful to him. "I don't deserve you." he whispered.
"Yes you do and do you know why?" Maddie said softly, "Because I'm nothing special. I'm just a woman who loves a man and who was made for you." she leaned over and kissed his lips softly before pulling back again.
He shifted, sliding his arm underneath and around her, pulling her closer. "You're wrong, Maddie, you're very special." She loved him, had chosen him, and he couldn't believe how lucky he was for that. The problem was he would end up doubting it way too often. Knowing that, his eyes started tearing up again and he looked away.
"So long as you think so then that's enough for me." Maddie replied, still watching him as she said softly "I love you Connor. If I say or do anything that's stupid or doesn't help always remember that. I've never felt about anyone the way I feel about you." Hell she wasn't even sure if those words would help or whether they would spook him out further but they were the truth. She loved him so much it hurt.
Looking back over at her, he recognized the look in her eyes. "The same here." he whispered and then swallowed. Oh god don't let me ruin this. All nerved up inside, he worked on shifting his focus.
"Yeah?" a soft smile spread over Maddie's features as her gaze locked with his and she allowed herself to drown in the moment.
Feeling that he needed to show her that he really did feel the same way, he buried his hand in her hair again and started kissing her, this time making it tender and taking his time.
Maddie let out a soft whimper of submission as she kissed him back. Compared to their first night together, the kiss was softer and full of even more emotion if that were at all possible and every nerve ending in her body lit up like a Christmas tree as she gave herself over to him completely.
The moment feeling more intense, Connor lifted himself just slightly above her, and moved to her neck as he untied her robe. Arching her neck to allow him better access, the delicate silk fell away from her body as he released the belt exposing the soft curves beneath.
His hands followed her curves, but his eyes went up to hers. "I do love you", he said, pulling away as he started to discard the rest of his clothes. "I love you too." she breathed as she watched him, her body igniting with desire as he undressed.
"Help me to focus on you, Maddie. Only you."
"Then make love to me." Maddie breathed as she added "I want you." At that moment those three words held more than one meaning to him.
He ran his hand up her naked thigh to her waist as he returned to her. "Your skin is so soft," he whispered before kissing her belly, "And you feel so good," he professed searching out her lips.
As their lips met, Maddie felt the familiar fireworks going off in her body. Never had a man made her feel the way Connor did. In his arms, she felt so alive and if making love to him right now helped him forget about his worries then who was she to deny him? Smiling against his lips she mumbled "I'm all yours Captain."
Needing her so much, he took her at her word.
Captain Madeline Sanchez
Assistant Dean
Magellan Campus
Doctor Connor McKinney
Dean
Magellan Campus
